The Hidden Forces Holding Back Driven Leaders
Have you ever looked at your calendar and it’s jam-packed? You’ve got strategy reviews, investor calls, one-on-ones back-to-back, yet you feel like you’re standing in wet cement. Super busy, but stuck. Maybe the metrics are green. The executive board says, “We love your vision.” But you still can’t shake this sense that nothing’s really moving.
I’m JB Bolton, an executive and business coach, and today we’re untangling why high-level leaders, perhaps like you, get stuck and, more importantly, how to regain some momentum.
Maya’s Leadership Moment: When Results Don’t Match the Effort
A few months ago, I was working with a leader. Let’s call her Maya. And right off the bat in our Google Meet she says, “Oh my gosh, I’m working so hard, I’m exhausted, but nothing’s moving.”
In Maya’s case, revenue is growing at the company. And has been for multiple years. But there’s this product pivot that has Maya frozen.
This is what organizational psychologist Adam Grant calls "Escalation of Commitment". It’s the sense of doubling down on a decision even when the evidence says it’s time to pivot.
And for executives and top leaders, the higher you climb, the fewer people challenge your assumptions, and the more ego you weld to being right.
Why Do Smart, Seasoned Leaders Get Stuck?
If you’re familiar with Daniel Pink’s book, Drive, he talks about motivation and why our motivational operating system crashes whenever three intrinsic needs are short-circuited. The words at first seem esoteric and lofty, but stick with me to see if you've felt this way or ways and didn't quite have the word for it. See if these sound familiar.
The three big reasons leaders feel stuck:
Decrease In Autonomy
The freedom to choose how you work erodes as the business grows. Processes, investors, directors, and journalists start nibbling away at your decision-making space.
MOTION NOT MASTERY
The drive to get better at what matters fades with process maturity. The higher you sit, the less honest feedback you get. When you’re a junior leader, you get too much feedback. At the top, it dries up and you start to lose the challenge.
LOST PURPOSE
The “why,” the conviction of the work that serves a bigger purpose, can get buried under quarterly guidance, cost containment memos, and the constant hustle.
When leaders plateau, at least one of these three drives is unplugged or unhinged. Daniel Pink has this quote:
“Control leads to compliance, and autonomy leads to engagement.”
When control mushrooms, curiosity shrinks.
Neurologically, autonomy and mastery and purpose light up the brain’s dopamine reward circuits and trigger social circuitry. That makes motivation feel worthwhile.
How to Get Unstuck
So how do you unstick the stuck and remove those cement boots? For starters, you can:
1. Reclaim Your Autonomy
For the next five work days, identify one recurring commitment you can eliminate, delegate, or shorten.
● Drop the Tuesday slide deck review. Hand it to your VP.
● Get a couple of hours back to begin working on the next thing.
● Reclaim autonomy by handing things down and freeing up some white space for you.
2. Reignite Mastery
Get curious. What are you interested in learning more about? Pick a leadership capability that energizes you.
● Is it storytelling? Deep listening? Financial nuance? AI?
● Invest ten focused minutes a day for four weeks.
● Set a micro goal. Pick something to grow. Re-energize the part of you that loves learning and re-engage your desire for mastery.
3. Reconnect to Your Purpose
Try story mining.
● Block forty-five minutes and interview three frontline employees or customers.
● Ask, “When did our product or service make a real difference for you?”
● Capture the stories. Use your phone to record and grab a transcript.
● Share one in your next all-hands or with your board.
Purpose crystallizes fast when leaders hear impact in human voices, not dashboards.
Re-anchor with a Personal Operating Rhythm
Every Sunday night, look at the coming week. Label your calendar items as autonomy, mastery, or purpose. If you can’t, redesign it or ask why it’s there. If you find most of your calendar doesn’t align with autonomy, mastery, or purpose, you may need to make significant changes; that can unlock a lot of energy.
Your Challenge
Carve out ninety minutes this week to run the “stop doing” sprint:
● Delegate something.
● Schedule your “deliberate tens”—what do you want to study?
● Hold one story mining call. Put it on the calendar before something else claims the space.
Most people who take this action report an energy shift within the next ten days. If this works for you, drop me a note here or at BoltonCo.Net. Tell me what you cut, what you practiced, and whose story reignited your purpose.
Remember, growth isn’t about adding more. We’re working to restore what matters: autonomy, mastery, and purpose, so you can lead forward.
I’m JB Bolton. Let’s get you unstuck and back to building the future your people are counting on.
